amen brother, very similar story here. i was actually talking to a buddy here a few months ago and i said "you remember that kid you were in highschool? the happy-go-lucky kid that had hopes, dreams, and a direction? what happened to that kid? its like he died, how do you get that back?" it took me a few days of pondering my own question and finally it hit me. music. through high-school, and the first few years afterwards playing with the army, my life was my music. when i quit playing to go active duty and do other things my life had made a steady downward spiral. that week i bought a guitar and started playing. within a few days i felt that old kid coming back to life. found my trombone and trumpet (which was a winston, ergo replaced) and havent' looked back. i havent felt this... human (lol) in years. i'll never let myself live without making music again.