ScreaminRaider

Something a friend e-mailed me...enjoy

50 THINGS ADMISSIONS NEVER TOLD YOU ABOUT COLLEGE
1. Quarters are gold.
2. Two meals per day is the standard.
3. Road trip whenever possible.
4. Going to the mailbox was never an ego booster/breaker before.
5. You will begin to nap again.
6. Your bookstore bill will almost equal tuition.
7. Squirt guns = Stress relief.
8. Instant messenger becomes an addiction.
9. E-mail becomes your second language.
10. College students throw paper airplanes too.
11. You never realized that so many people were smarter than
you.
12. College football is the coolest thing on the planet.
13. Western Europe could be wiped out by a horrible plague and you
wouldn't know, but you can recite last week's re-run of The Simpsons
verbatim.
14. Cartoons are for all ages, especially Scooby Doo.
15. Disney movies are more than just classics.
16. You will never rent more movies in your life.
17. No one is too old for video games.
18. Procrastination is an art form.
19….edited out
20. Thanks to Aimster/Audiogalaxy/Morpheus/Limewire, you will never
listen to one of your CDs ever again.
21. It never sucked so much to get sick.
22. The health service nurses are there because they couldn't make
it at a real hospital. Never, don't ever forget that.
23. Care packages are right up there with birthdays.
24. Campus is only clean for Family Weekend and Freshman
Orientation.
25. Nothing you want to register for will be open.
26. Classes... the later the better.
27. You are no longer thankful that the fire alarms are here to
protect you.
28. Jeans may be worn as many times as the wearer desires.
29. The only time to dress up is when your jeans are dirty.
30. Showers become less important; sleep becomes more
important.
31. Asleep by 2:30 am is an early night.
32. Creativity in the dining halls is key...
33. The freshman 15 is NOT a myth!!! (Or how about freshman 20.)
34. If it's snowing out, the only reason you will leave your room is
for food.
35. Dishes smell after days of piling up.
36. Cereal makes a meal any time of the day.
37. You will eat anywhere that is a buffet.
38. You will eat anything that is free.
39.New additions to food groups: ramen and pizza.
40. Stealing from the dining hall will become second nature.
41. ATM's are the devils advocate. ATM= Another Twenty Missing.
42. Keys have never been so important, yet you seem to lose them or
lock yourself out of the room even more.
43. Duct tape heals all wounds.
44. If they say you can't have it in your dorm, they are just
kidding.
45. You will come to hate hallways/elevators with a passion.
46. Those ugly cinder blocks are not sound proof.
47. Pictures, posters, emails or anything else to cover the ugly
cell we live in will be transformed into wallpaper.
48. Everyone is only nice for the first week. After that, no matter
how nice you are, some people just won't smile back. Get used to
it.
49. You are never alone!
50. You realize college is the ideal lifestyle, except for those
pesky classes

TOP 10 REASONS THAT COLLEGE IS LIKE PRESCHOOL
10. You cry for your mother.
9. You cross the street without looking for cars.
8. Snack time is a necessity.
7. You bundle up for the outdoors without caring what you look like
(because everyone else looks as stupid as you do).
6. You stay at home and play games with your friends.
5. You wear your backpack on both shoulders.
4. You wear big mittens.
3. Playing in the snow is a legitimate activity.
2. You take naps.
1. You look forward to grilled cheese sandwiches.

YOU KNOW YOU'VE BEEN IN COLLEGE TOO LONG WHEN...
You actually like doing laundry at home.
Two miles is not too far to walk for a party.
You'd rather clean than study.
"Oh #$%^ how did it get so late!" comes out of your mouth at least
once a night.
Mom's Meatloaf and potatoes become something you desire, not
avoid.
Half the time you don't wake up in your own bed and it seems
normal.
You schedule your classes around sleep habits and soap operas.
You know the pizza boy by name.
You go to sleep when it's light and get up when it's dark.
You live for getting mail.
Looking out the window is a form of entertainment.
Prank phone calls become funny again.
You start thinking and sounding like your roommate.
Blacklights and highlighters are the coolest things on earth.
Rearranging your room is your favorite pastime.
Wal-mart is the coolest store.
The weekend lasts from Thursday to Sunday.

BEFORE I CAME TO COLLEGE, I WISH I HAD KNOWN…
That it didn't matter how late I scheduled my first class, I'd
still sleep through it.
That I could change so much and barely realize it.
That you can love a lot of people in a lot of different ways.
No matter how 'cool' you were in highschool, no one here cares.
That if you wear polyester everyone will ask why you are so dressed
up.
That every clock on campus shows a different time.
That if you were smart in high school, so what? It doesn't matter
here.
That I would go to a party the night before a final.
That Chem Labs/Architecture studios take up more time than all my
other classes put together.
That you can know everything and fail a test.
That you can know nothing and ace a test.
That I could get used to almost anything found out about my
roommate.
That most of my education would be obtained outside of class.
That friendship is more than getting drunk together.
That I would be one of those people that my parents warned me
about.
That Sunday is a figment of the world's imagination.
That Psychology is really Biology. That Biology is really
Chemistry, that Chemistry is really Physics and that Physics is
really Math.
That my parents would become so much smarter in the last few
years.

__________________
Jonathan Wright