| Is it true that at....
70 degrees
Texans turn on the heat and unpack the thermal underwear.
In Minnesota, people go swimming in the lakes.
60 degrees
North Carolinians try to turn on the heat.
People in Minnesota plant gardens.
50 degrees
Californians shiver uncontrollably.
People in Minnesota sunbathe.
40 degrees
Italian & English cars won't start.
People in Minnesota drive with the windows down.
32 degrees
Distilled water freezes.
Lake Superior water gets thicker.
20 degrees
Floridians wear coats, underwear, gloves, and woolly hats.
People in Minnesota throw on a flannel shirt.
15 degrees
Philadelphia landlords finally turn up the heat.
People in Minnesota have the last cookout before it gets cold.
10 degrees
People in Miami all die.
People from Minnesota lick a flagpole.
0 degrees
Californians fly to Mexico.
People in Minnesota look for their winter coats.
-20 degrees
Hollywood disintegrates.
The Girl Scouts in Minnesota are selling cookies door to door.
-60 degrees
Polar bears begin to evacuate the Arctic.
Minnesota Boy Scouts postpone "Winter Survival" classes... until it gets cold enough.
-80 degrees
Mount St. Helen's freezes.
People in Minnesota rent some videos.
-100 degrees
Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.
Minnesotans get frustrated because they can't thaw a keg.
-297 degrees
Microbial life no longer survives on dairy products.
Cows in Minnesota complain about farmers with cold hands.
-460 degrees
ALL atomic motion stops (absolute zero in the Kelvin scale).
People in Minnesota start saying, "Cold 'nuff for ya?"
-500 degrees
Hell freezes over.
The Minnesota Vikings win the Super Bowl!!!
-cw-
I know at least they've BEEN, unlike the Lions
__________________
Chuck Willard
The Willard of Oz
"Don't be afraid to see what you see."
Ronald Reagan |