kadleck

I'm sure this is old but I just saw it now for the first time:


Subject: Things Trumpet players NEVER say

"Sorry, that adlib solo was way too over the top. I'll take it down a notch next time."

"I was playing too loud."

"Sorry, it was me that was off-tempo."

"I make plenty of money!"

"I can't decide between the Ferrari and the Mercedes."

"I'm not good enough to play first. Is it OK if I sit in the fourth
chair?"

"He's a much better trumpet player than I am."

"Man, your solo was great. I'm glad I didn't have to do it. It
wouldn't have sounded as good."

"The last measure says '8va' but I'd prefer to play it as written."

"I only need one trumpet."

"I use my E-flat/D all the time!"

"I need to tune up."

"I chose a trumpet based on my needs, rather than worrying about the
kind Wayne Bergeron plays."

"All you need is a good 'D'. Anything higher than that is just screeching."

"Excuse me. Can you ask the clarinet section to play louder? We can't
hear them."

"That was a beautiful flute solo!"

"I really wish I had learned to play the oboe instead."

"I have a solo coming up, but I'd rather the sax take it."

"I didn't like the way Miles played that."

"Haydn wrote a trumpet Concerto?"

"Maynard who?"

"Man, there's nothing like a good marimba concert!"

"My schedule is so busy, I have to turn down gigs."

"Finally! A nice quiet slow passage!"

"I turned that down. They offered me too much money."

"So many girlfriends. I have trouble keeping up with them."

"I tried out for that, but I was rejected because I just wasn't good
enough."

rowuk

Mr. Kadlek,
is that autobiographical?

Fluffy615

Ha Ha and Ha! It's great to poke fun at ourselves. Especially before anyone else does, this way we actually look humble! LOL That's great Tony, thanks. I'll add it to my collection of trumpet player jokes.
The problem with humor is there's always a little truth in it.
Bob

kadleck

Rowuk -

OUCH ... I'm feeling the heat all the way from Germany! I think you left a mark on my (now deflated) ego!

Tony

Vulgano Brother

Gee, I thought Tony was being very humble by leaving out the "other," as in "Things other Trumpeter players NEVER say," and I'm grateful he didn't write "Things Vulgano Brothers NEVER say," because we go for the Mercedes every time.

mike ansberry

Ha! Pretty good. For some reason it brought to my mind a time when a friend of mine, Rod Hill was doing trumpet impersonations. It was really weird. He'd do an imitation of Miles Davis imitating Al Hirt. He'd play Java and sound just like I'd imagine Miles doing it. Then he'd do Maynard Ferguson imitating Chet Baker. He could go on and on. He was so good at it we'd be rolling on the floor.

trumpetdiva1

I tell you, Tony, since I moved to New York City and have heard nothing but the best jazz trumpet players, including yourself, I have been saying some of those things to myself. I know that must sound scary.

* I now play softer. It used to be higher, faster, and louder. I am no longer known as a “screech” player. Well, that is a plus. Of course, I am no longer known either. Ouch!
* I would not mind playing fourth (even though I’m though I am very used to playing and was known as a lead trumpet player).
* I have no problem finding myself surrounded by great players that I am grateful to just hear them (and not even perform with them).
* I find myself working more toward the pedal C range instead of the double C range.
* I also find myself so exhausted from my day job and the commute to and from Manhattan that I am wiped out before I even begin playing. (In Pennsylvania I could walk to work and the rehearsals and practice rooms were easily within walking distance. I also had the energy and stamina to practice several hours each day).
* I could afford trumpet lessons, new trumpets, music books, and many CD’s to add to my jazz collection. Now that money and then some goes to paying rent. I like to eat, too.

I tell you, it is very humbling experience as a trumpet player (if I even deserve to call myself that anymore) when you live in New York City. Sure, I continue to practice and perform for my neighbors as well as my dog in my humble Brooklyn abode.

Tony, would you happen to have any advice to any NYC trumpet players or elsewhere who may have lost their egos. Any words of wisdom would be greatly appreciated. I want to find a way to pick up my deflated ego from the sidewalk and move on. I do not want sympathy, but any suggestions would be nice. I just feel like I am an awful trumpet player these days since I moved here, which may not even be true.

Thanks,

Janell

kadleck

Obviously, the jokes are just that - jokes!

I think that the truth is that trumpet players are actually harder on themselves than most other musicians. It's such a "hit or miss", day-to-day, physical thing. Of course there are some who actually say some of the things mentioned above (and mean them), but the vast majority of players are quite critical of themselves.

Janell - I will send you a PM.

Tony

Rgale

Janell- I can relate to what you say. It is true in many places, but in NYC more so than anywhere else. Everywhere you go, every job you want , there's somebody there who claims it as their own. Often because they've played it before and done a good job. There are more players than jobs, and that's just a fact.

I made it only because I was willing to also teach and do other things that many players were not willing to do. I still do .I did other jobs for a few years. And I had a wife who supported me for a couple of years while I made truly sad sums of money. And that's in an easier place to make it than NYC.

The good news is that it can be done. But it's very diffucult, and takes time, and there are certainly no guarantees.

I wish you the very best of luck. As I am sure Mr. Kadleck does.

Many Thanks for the jokes, Mr. Kadleck.

reesetee1

AND THIS IS A JOOOOOOKE!!!

Janell...You could learn to play Trombone!!!...LOLOLOLOLOLOL

IT WAS A JOOOOOOOO<BREATHE>OOOOOOOKE!!!